Ryan's Journal

About twenty-five people high-schoolers died today in Littleton, Colorado at Columbine High School. Another twenty got shot. What went on in those trench-coated minds that said, "Let's kill" - what happened there? What is it about two outcasts rejected by their peers which decides murder is a solution? And why do I care so much about this stupid schoolwork when people are dying?

If they hadn't killed themselves, they probably would have gotten the death penatly. Premeditated murder of that many people is just too much for this society's justice system to handle. Forgiveness means all that much more when it seems so hard to forgive. There are probably some twisted vigilantes out there looking to even the score with some Trench Coat Mafia lives. But it's by far the higher and harder road to look one of them in the eye and say, "You're forgiven." I wonder what went on inside Jesus' head when he looked at so many of us and said the same. What sort of things had the woman with bleeding, the paralytic, the man with the shriveled hand done which, simply in the fact of existence, pained God? How hard is must have been - and how much love and mercy it takes - for a God so perfect to look a sinner in the eye and tell them, "Your sins are forgiven." I hope somebody shares that love with whoever's left. It saves lives.

All this reminds me of a discussion I overheard last year. Somebody took up the stance that people are at different levels of worth; there were, to him, the druggies and drunks who didn't deserve life. Then there were the pillars of the community who deserved their position and others' respect. All I can say is that Jesus knocked down the pillars and gave worth to the worthless. You and I might see these two guys as the lowest of low, but in all of us, God sees His own, ready for redemption if only we ask.

Only two days of writing and everything already seems more interesting..."too much thinking" maybe...

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